What a “Good Day” Looks Like: Structuring Life as a High Performing Parent
A “good day” used to mean crossing everything off your work to-do list. Now it means getting through a day without forgetting practice or feeling like you shortchanged your kids or your job. This post is for every parent trying to keep performance high at work and be fully present at home.
The Myth: The idea of “balance” makes it sound like there’s some magic formula where work and family sit evenly on a scale. But the truth is, high-performing parents rarely have perfect symmetry. The myth is that balance is about equal time or energy. That you can give 50 percent to your home life and 50 percent to your career. But that’s not how life really works. Some days are more work-heavy, some days focused on recitals or class trips. Balance isn’t static, it’s dynamic. Real balance is about alignment and making sure your time matches your priorities over time, not just day to day.
Reframe the Issue: Instead of balance, think rhythm. You can’t give everything 100 percent all the time, but you can design your days with intention. That means defining what a “successful” day looks like for you and structuring your time to support it. It also means knowing which non-negotiables protect your peace and presence.
Practical Strategies:
Define your version of success. Is it a calm morning with your kid? A focused afternoon sprint at work? A dinner where no one’s on their phone? Write it down.
Create a daily anchor. Choose one consistent moment that grounds your day. For example, walking your kid to school, a midday workout, or reading a story at night. For me, it’s physical exercise with Darius. It keeps us both accountable.
Use time blocks, not to-do lists. Block off time on your calendar for focus work, transitions, meals, and kid time. Treat these like meetings.
Outsource and automate. Use tech or services to free up time. Grocery delivery, auto-bill pay, and shared calendars go a long way. This is a real game-changer! It takes a little time to set up the systems, but they are invaluable once you do.
Give yourself a reset ritual. When a day goes sideways, have a go-to reset move. It could be a walk, music, or a 5-minute phone break with someone who gets it.
From My Life: I used to feel like I had to “earn” time with my son by over-performing at work. It wasn’t sustainable. Now I have a few simple rules: mornings belong to us, I take one midday break to check in with him during school, and I shut my laptop or stop checking work emails at 6(ish) unless there’s a fire. My days aren’t perfect, but they’re consistent—and that’s what keeps both sides of me fueled.
Closing Reflection: A good day isn’t about doing everything. It’s about doing the right things with intention. You can be high-performing at work and high-impact at home. But it starts by redefining what success looks like and giving yourself permission to structure your days accordingly.
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